Religious fucktards are a target you can’t miss. There’s just so many of them, from the Mormons with their magic underwear invading California to take away equal rights for gay couples, Scientologists with their magic flying saucer space ghost woowoo, or the wackaloons of Westboro Baptist who protest outside military funerals with signs saying that the dead soldier deserved to die ’cause he served a corrupt nation or some shit like that (hey, isn’t that what that motherfucker Osama bin Laden said too?).
So anyhow, I could give out golden hairball awards all day long to these woowoo dickwads who are so fucking crazy that they think their imaginary bullshit is, like, real, but then I’d be a goddamned bald kittie. So I hafta choose one, and only one. Who shall it be? The dickwads at Westboro Baptist who protested outside of the Obama girls’ school saying that the Obama girls were going to go to Hell? WTF? Why do they hate Michigan, anyhow? Or what?
But then comes some fucktardedness from those dress-wearing kiddie-fuckers at the Catholic Church that tops it all: Catholic Church to shut down their charity services in Washington D.C. if the Washington D.C. city council passes law giving equal rights to gays. Apparently they have a new Bible where Jesus says to the poor, “yo, I’d feed you some of these fishes and loaves, but the city council said I can’t discriminate against gays anymore so I’m outta here.” That passage ain’t in any version of the Christian Bible that I looked at (pretty much every other depravity is from child murder to incest — that’s some sick fucking shit, meow!), but fuck, it’s the only explanation if they claim to be followin’ the teachings of Jesus, right? Or maybe those gay-ass dress-wearin’ fucktards just spend so much time fucking each other up every orifice of their bodies that their brains just splurted out their ears from the pressure of all that cum, like the world’s ugliest fucking hairball…
So, Catholic Archdiocese of Washington, congratulations on winning the prestigious Golden Hairball Award for this week. Archbishop Donald W. Wuerl, please direct me to your closet so I can deposit it in your best set of high heeled pumps, meow!